How I acted

I know all the tricks
my mind plays on itself
I recognize it perfectly
and could write
exactly how it ticks.

But I can’t change
the way it goes
not on my own.

Because of that
I’m also aware
why I’m so scared
to ask for help.

I’m scared to say it out loud
to say the way you acted
resulted in how I reacted
and eventually got distracted
Cause I’m a people pleaser
to the ones closest to me
and hope that you can see
I had to say this
so I could save me.